October 28, 2009

Wednesday

I’m not doing so great today. Dan left to go to his interviews in California, and I took him and his friend Ryker to the airport this morning. I missed my first class today, which irritated me, but I got over it. I instead focused on cranking out a paper for my sociology class, and I felt fine after being distracted. I went to the rest of my classes, which were fine.

It was super-cold today. Walking to the car after school was not a fun adventure. I should’ve worn more clothes.

Tonight I have been slacking off a lot. I don’t feel like doing homework. I feel really horrible at the moment. I got home, ate, watched TV, talked to Daniel, did a little thinking about what I’m going to do with my life. I went to an enrichment activity tonight. We learned how to make cards with a girl in our ward. She’s really talented. I have wanted to be more involved in the ward, so I thought this was a good opportunity to do so. I was hoping to get to know some of the girls in my ward, maybe make some friends. And this was perfect, because only about 5 girls showed up, and I feel like I do better in smallish groups. I sometimes feel overwhelmed with a lot of people, especially if I don’t know most of them all that well. Anyway, it was odd, I thought, because nobody really talked to me, even though I was trying to strike up conversation. I would even talk directly to someone, and they wouldn’t hear me or ignored me. It’s hard to tell. It was just interesting how I’m trying to put in the effort, and nothing is coming of it. And I’m frustrated and hurt and I feel bad about myself.

Anyway, I called my mom afterwards, on my way home, because she called and it’s been a while since I’ve talked to her. And it was nice to talk to her, but she told me about things that are going on at home. Mary is on Homecoming Court, which is exciting for her, and mom’s really busy with helping her with that. But I just don’t understand why I’m always the last one to know things happening in my family. My sisters never call me, my parents call me usually once a week. But they are all so involved with everyone else in the family, except me. Diane and Julie and Mary are always talking to each other, on the phone or on facebook. No one ever calls me or sends me messages. I feel like if I weren’t even to call any of them or come home ever, or even be involved in the family at all, I wouldn’t be missed.

Things have been deteriorating for a year, or at least, that’s when I have felt it start. And for months I’ve tried to push aside the feelings I have about my family or about people not liking me; but things keep cropping up that make me see what’s really going on. And I’m really hurt. And I don’t know how to change it. And Dan doesn’t understand, or really care to (which I don’t blame him for). So I can’t really seek comfort in him. I’m just struggling.

 October 27, 2009

Tuesday

It’s been a week since I’ve written, but not much has gone on. That Thursday after my birthday, I spent a lot of the day really down. Since Dan and I had gotten into a little fight the night before (entirely my fault about something SO not worth it), he was upset with me, and I didn’t like how I felt all day long. About mid-afternoon I started to feel better, but then I read for my Sociology class, and it made me depressed all over again. I also went to visit my visiting teaching companion, Kendra Manwaring. I had called her a couple of Sundays ago, and we set up to meet before going to visit teach, so that we weren’t strangers on our first visit. She’s a nice girl, a tiny bit awkward. She has a little 3 month old baby, so cute. And she’s quite the athlete. She just did a triathlon with her husband a couple of weekends ago, which I think is really cool, and I really admire her for it. Kind of an interesting day. Dan and I ended the day well, though, because we decided not to be upset with each other (I felt really bad about it anyways), and things were better.

Friday we had a fun date. We both stayed on campus a little later that day to work on homework and get some studying done. Once we got home, we sort of messed around, ate some dinner, watched some TV, and did a little bit of studying. It was pretty good. Then we went to see “Where the Wild Things Are” in the theaters. Daniel really wanted to see it all last week, and the weekend before when it came out. But we had Kat and Mike over, and then it was my birthday…so we finally went to see it Friday. It wasn’t very good at all. It was really depressing the whole way through. And we were both expecting some fabulous happy ending …. But it never came. The kid wasn’t happy, the monsters he left weren’t happy, nothing was ever resolved, and we didn’t really like it. It was definitely disappointing; I was afraid it would be, but I was still curious and wanting to see it. It’s nothing like the book.

Dan and I spent all day studying on Saturday. Really. All day. We had a lot of studying to catch up on, especially me. I was three reading assignments behind in my chemistry class. Anyway, we only took a short break to work out, and then we used some of the gift cards we got from the wedding to go to Outback Steakhouse for dinner. When we got home, we studied some more, and then I needed a break, so we started watching “Sense and Sensibility”.

We had a really good Sunday. I got my calling on Sunday. I’m on the committee for enrichment meetings. Lately, I have been feeling kind of down about our ward, just because we’ve been here for 2 months, and I feel like I don’t know anyone yet. But I also feel like I’ve been making a better effort than I usually do, so I was really frustrated. This last Sunday, I met a new girl, who I actually visit teach, and I talked with some other girls I’ve met before. Plus, I’ve been more willing to make comments in Relief Society and Sunday School, and it’s really a more rewarding experience at church when I am more involved. Anyway, when we got back from church, I went visiting teaching. It was fun to visit with the girl we visited, Jamie Clark. She’s an art education major, and she is doing her student teaching right now, graduating in December. She’s way nice, and I really like her. When I got home, Dan and I took a nap together. I slept for longer than I had planned/wanted to. But I felt very refreshed afterwards. Adam and Liz came over after I napped, and we talked with them for a while. They are planning to take a trip to Italy at the end of this school year (they both served missions in Italy), and they were telling us how we could come with them. We were making all these plans and calculating (or rather, letting Adam calculate) how much it would cost to go for both of us. I really enjoyed the planning. I really want to go, but Dan’s super-wary of money (as he should be…as I should be), and he doesn’t seem convinced that we could do it. It would be so amazing to go with people who have been there already and know all the good places to visit and eat and stuff. We would probably not even have to pay for living arrangements, because members that they know could house us while we are there. Oh, man! I want to go so bad with them! It would be SOOOO incredible, and I have always wanted to go to Italy.

Anyway, after Liz and Adam left, we went to Dan’s family’s house, because they had a special birthday dinner for me, with 7layer salad, chicken cordon bleu, brownies…Mmmm! It was fun. I really love them! They make me feel so welcome and loved. They’re all so kind; that’s one thing I really love about them, they’re all so kind to each other…at least from what I observe.

Yesterday started the 2-week period of craziness for me. So after dropping Daniel off and finding a treasure of a parking spot right at the bottom of where my class is, I went non-stop at school. I went to all of my classes, and in the break I had, I worked on my pathophysiology presentation. I got that done when I got home from school. For Family Home Evening, Daniel and I had a short discussion about music (based on the For Strength of Youth pamphlet), and then we carved pumpkins (the ones we got from the pumpkin patch) while we finished watching “Sense and Sensibility”. It was fun. Our pumpkins are cute.

Today, I spent all day studying, with a few breaks. I stopped to watch devotional, which was really good. The speaker was a man who has worked to build schools for children, mainly girls, in Afghanistan. It really inspired me to do more service and get into humanitarian work. Maybe that’s what I’ll do after I graduate. Then I watched Gilmore Girls while folding laundry, and washed dishes. Then, at 6pm, Dan and I went to the other section for guitar class, came home, ate, and had some visits. Our home teacher came to see us, and then right after, the Bishopric came to visit.

I registered for my last semester at BYU yesterday. It was bitter-sweet. I’m sad to leave BYU and stop learning in a university setting, but I also am ready to be done and doing other things that I want to do. After looking at my classes, my transcript and the requirements for Dental Hygiene schools, I’m thinking going to Dental Hygiene school is not going to be all that possible. There are far too many complications in trying to make this work. So, now I’m trying to think of other things I could do after graduation: find a job, do some internships, do personal training certification…. I don’t know, I’m just trying to keep my options open at this point.

I’ve been really proud of myself. I have been getting up early to work out in the mornings almost every day before school. It’s been really great. It gets me up and moving, I have more energy in the day, I feel better about myself. It’s really good. I just find that I’m in a better mood more often when I work out consistently, and I’m usually not as tired. I made it a goal to work out more, and this is working really well, getting up in the morning. 

 October 21, 2009

Wednesday

Brianna came over on Sunday night, and we had a good time with her. She’s a nice girl. We just talked to her about what it’s been like for her to be at BYU and what she’s been up to. Apparently, she’s been dating a lot. I think that’s good. As much as I like her, I don’t think Brian should marry her.

Monday was an ordinary day. I had a test to take in the morning, so Dan dropped me off south of campus. I didn’t do very well on that exam, but I’d expected that. I had studied as much as my nerves could take (I stressed a lot over this one); but by Monday morning, I just didn’t care anymore how I did. There are always other tests. After school, Dan and I studied for a while and then had FHE. He did a lesson, mostly a scriptural discussion about something he was reading earlier. But it was good, it got me thinking more about the scriptures. We played racquetball for our activity, and then after we’d played for a while, Dan wanted to run on the track. So he ran the track, and I ran the stairs, for an extra little workout. It felt way good to be active, especially since I didn’t get a chance to work out that day. When we got home, we had to go the store to pick up a few things (which naturally took longer than planned), and we had to do the dishes (which had piled up from the day before). We didn’t get to bed until almost midnight.

Tuesday morning, I went to the gym first thing, studied most of the morning for my exam, and then went to take the Health Occupations Exam at UVU (not the test I was studying for). It took me forever to find the building; I had to call Daniel to help me locate it, and I was really frustrated, and he was really frustrated. Then, when I was actually taking the test, it kept freezing up on me for no reason (and it happened a lot), so I kept having to call the proctor back over to unfreeze the program. But I ended up doing pretty well on it. Overall, I think I was in the 93 percentile of those who’ve taken it. Not bad. That night, Dan and I didn’t do anything but study and go to bed. We did make chicken tetrazzini for dinner, and I had to meet with my new group for Pathophysiology presentation, which took longer than I thought/wanted it to take.

Today is my birthday. It’s been a good day. I woke up in the morning to work out, and when I got back, I got several phone calls from family members to wish me a happy birthday. Dan made me chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast, which were absolutely delicious. It was sweet of him to do it. He even let me open presents in the morning. He gave me a few fun things, Shrek the movie, and Cheez-its. Before going to school, I finished the book I’d been reading for my workouts: Year of Wonder. I liked it, although it seemed to get a little questionable towards the end. It’s based on a true story, which intrigues me….well, actually it’s based on an actual city; but it’s mostly a fictional book. But now I’m really interested in the real town where it took place. Now that it’s finished, I find it a very thought-provoking book, which is strange and hard to explain.

Dan dropped me off at school. I went to class, and then went straight to the testing center to take my sociology exam. I got an A- on it. So, I’m really pleased. Especially since I didn’t study very much for it (I didn’t think it would be that hard).  The person helping me to get my test saw that it was my birthday and gave me a special “Happy Birthday , from the testing center” pencil. It was pretty funny! After the test, I ate some leftover chicken tetrazzini and  studied until my patho class. What was funny was that I forgot to bring a fork to eat the leftovers, so I had to buy some vending machine food that had a sort of eating utensil so that I could eat. I had to get a bagel with cream cheese, because it comes with a mini spoon. So here I was eating tetrazzini with a tiny spoon. It must’ve looked hilarious. I had another ordeal in patho. My patho teacher has us review the concepts we learn after the end of a chapter, and he walks around to help students and answer questions. I was sitting alone today, because I couldn’t see any of my friends in the class (and I was late anyway). My professor knows me, and so he came over to quiz me on my knowledge. He’d ask me something, and I tried to answer to the best of my memory…which wasn’t great. I could hardly remember anything. And I felt bad, as if I was a reflection of his teaching. I take really good notes, mostly so that I can stay awake and pay attention. But my memory of past material is awful, unless I study it extensively. I felt awful. And he seemed incredulous at my not remembering anything. It was bad.

After school, Daniel picked me up and took me to Thai Ruby for dinner, where we ate much curry. It was delicious, and Dan actually really liked it. He wants to go back, I think. We then headed to a little recreational farm, with a petting zoo, corn maze, haunted house and pumpkin patch. Mostly we were there for the pumpkin patch, because I have wanted to go to one since the beginning of October. It was way fun. We fed and pet goats and looked at all the animals. We slid down this really big slide in gunny sacks. We went through a kiddy haunted house. And we went to the patch to pick up our perfect pumpkins. They are beautiful, and I’m so excited to finally have a pumpkin! It was so perfect and fun to go there on my birthday, and I think Daniel is brilliant for thinking of it. When we got home, we put a couple of cakes in the oven (and when I say “we” did it, I mean Daniel did it). A bunch of people came over to celebrate my birthday: Mike Nelson, Alison, Jimmy/Patrick and a girl he brought with him (Lauren), Adam and Liz, Bowman and Stephanie, Cody and Andy. It was way fun. They sang to me and we ate cake and talked altogether. After most everyone left, Bowman, Steph, Dan and I played a couple of rounds of canasta. It was both fun and frustrating (as Canasta sometimes is!).

The night ended with scripture study and prayer with Daniel, and by myself. And we both went to bed. I was a little upset at something too trivial to even mention, but I needed a little catharsis, so I got up to write. Daniel is currently sleeping, I hope. I really love my husband so much. He is so wonderful. Sometimes he does things that upset me or throw me off, but that’s generally my problem, and I’m aware of that. I need to work on it. He did so many thoughtful things for me today, and I feel bad that the day ended as it did. If he ever reads this, I hope he knows that I love him so much! And I’m grateful to him for all he does for me. 

 October 18, 2009

Sunday

It’s been a good weekend. On Friday, Kat and Mike came over to hang out. We hadn’t seen them since Dan’s birthday and it’s weird that we haven’t hung out as much, seeing as we used to all the time. They brought over dinner, a delicious pasta dish…but it had peanut butter in it, so Daniel couldn’t eat it, and they felt so bad that they had forgotten Dan was allergic to nuts. They were about to leave to make something else to bring for dinner, but we made them stay. I don’t even think Daniel cares that much, anyway. We heated him up some spaghetti to eat, and we had fun anyways.

After dinner, we played a bunch of games, all of which Mike won. Kat and I were flabbergasted (she was really upset about one of them, because she was so close to winning, but we kept setting her off, at our own expense, until Mike one), but Daniel just laughed about it. It was pretty funny. Earlier that day, I had troubled over making flan for dessert. It was a lot harder than I thought it would be. So I was worried it wouldn’t turn out very well. But it was actually really good…and now, after having been in the fridge for over a day, it’s even better! I’ll just have to make it again. We had a lot of fun with Kat and Mike, but it was also a little weird. It’s almost like I don’t know how to have friends now that I’m married, especially friends I had before we got married. The last half of the time that they were over, I felt like I was not being as much myself, which I thought was strange. I wasn’t trying to do that, but it was happening. Plus, Kat has changed. The way that she and Mike were before (loud, opinionated, argumentative, sarcastic) has heightened since they got married, and I find that I don’t want to be like that, so I have to not act myself. Oh, they are still fun, and funny to be around. They definitely make us laugh. But…the change in her isn’t positive, I don’t think. It’s weird. I have to figure out how to be a friend with my old friends now that I’m married. Lots of things to learn now that I’m married.

Yesterday was busy. Dan and I had a lot of stuff to do. We slept later than we’d planned, so we didn’t get as much done. I have a test tomorrow, so I’ve been stressing about it and having enough time to study for it. And yesterday, a lot went on, and I thought I wouldn’t have time to study. Daniel was a really good husband, though, and gave me as much time to study as he could. We went to the temple to do sealings in the morning. I love going to the temple. What peace we can feel there! After the temple, Dan was in not so good a mood, and after a while of trying to get him to feel better, I wasn’t either. We cleaned up the house a bit after the temple, and then I went to Rebekah’s baby shower with Stephanie. We drove up to South Jordan together to the shower. It was fun. My family was there, we played some games, ate some good food, watched her open presents. Dan and I got her (that morning after the temple) some cute little tops of all different ages. I figured she would get a bunch of new baby clothes, but babies grow fast, and she’d need all different sizes in the next couple of years. I think she really appreciated the difference in sizes that we gave her.

The people who hosted the shower had a wicked awesome house. Their house was full of wood furniture, cabinets, and floors that the husband had done. And their backyard had a covered hot tub, a bunch of fruit trees, and a coy pond! It was such a fun house and yard. They had some interesting dogs too. Italian Greyhounds: look them up.

When Stephanie and I got back, I studied all afternoon until Dan and I went on a hot date. We went to Subway for dinner, which we ate in the parking lot at BYU. And then we went to an Ernst and Young event, a concert with Ryan Shuppe and the Rubberband. It was an awesome concert, they are really good performers, and we had a really good time. It’s amazing how much money these accounting companies spend on recruiting at BYU. They gave each couple a free CD, and in the lobby of the Joseph Smith Building, they had set up these tables with buckets full of candy that we could just take, and a city backdrop with a bunch of Smart Cookie cookies on sticks in this peg board. We walked away with two cookies, two oranges, and two bags full of candy, plus that CD. We only talked to the recruiter from San Jose for about 5-10 minutes, and yet Ernst and Young spent SO much MONEY on that event for BYU students. Amazing! How come my college doesn’t have something like that? J

We didn’t go to bed last night until almost one in the morning, so we were exhausted in church today, and I was super-grumpy. I feel like we have been in the ward for two months and we don’t know most people in our ward. I also feel like I have been making better efforts than I ever have in my life to get to know the sisters and serve the sisters in this ward, even though I don’t know them. I sign up to go and plan to go to enrichment activities, but something always comes up. I sign up to help someone out, so that I can meet them. Almost every Sunday, I try to sit by someone new or introduce myself to someone. But despite all of these efforts, I also feel like I haven’t gotten anywhere with them. I don’t know anyone, and all the people I have met feel awkward around me, etc. I thought I would be blessed for trying so hard, but I feel like I haven’t. So, today I was very frustrated and grumpy. I went into one of the bathroom stalls to be alone and to pray. I told Heavenly Father of all my frustrations and that I was having a hard time dealing with them. I still sat by myself in RS today (maybe I should’ve made more of an effort, but I wasn’t much in the mood), but I felt much comfort and love. I didn’t feel as bitter and I felt more charitable. There was a small group discussion in the lesson, and I had no problems turning around to join another group. I participated in the lesson, and I made a mental note to be more diligent in visiting teaching. I just feel like my testimony of prayer and the love of God increase. I prayed for help and comfort, and I was blessed with that. I was reminded of my place, and my responsibility to think of others and to be charitable. And I was inspired to be better with my visiting teaching. Plus, in my prayer, I said that I wanted a calling so that I could get to know some of the others in our ward and so that I can serve them. And today, (Dan answered my phone) I got an appointment to meet with the bishopric to get a calling. I just feel like I was blessed today, maybe even when I didn’t deserve it. And I learned a lot from the experience.

Dan and I took a nap today after church and lunch, for about 2 hours. I’m going to go read and make some phone calls, and then tonight, Brianna Houck (Brian’s little girlfriend) is coming over for dinner tonight, and we are pretty excited.

Hopefully this week will be good. By my birthday, I should be done with all my test craziness for a while. And that’s a relief!

 October 15, 2009

Thursday

So, Monday was not such a good day, but the rest of this week has been pretty good. Yesterday, I got up to work out, which felt so good, and then I went to school with Daniel. I dropped him off at the Tanner Building, parked and then went to the Wilk to see some of the people in the Center for Service and Learning. One of the ladies that works there, Ronalee, was the teacher of my student development class as a freshman. I think I was the only one from her class who stayed in contact with her, and now we are friends. She is the one who got me working with the Center, and because of her, I was a PD for TOPS for the last two years. It’s been a great experience knowing her and being involved with the Center. Anyways, she collects sand from different places, and while Dan and I were on our honeymoon in Mexico, I collected some really thick, grainy sand for her from Huatulco. So, yesterday, I went in with a dual purpose: to give her the sand (and some sea shells I had also collected at the beach), and to get a letter of recommendation from Casey, the director of the Center. He was really nice about doing that for me, and now I have one of my DH applications taken care of. I sent in the actual application a few days ago, and he was the last person I requested a letter from, so I’m done with UCDH application. It felt good to get that out of the way.

Classes were good yesterday. I felt like I learned a lot in Spanish and Pathophysiology particularly. I always have a hard time staying focused in Biochemistry, and Sociology (though usually refreshing from my usual science classes) was none too exciting because we were going over an article. I felt like I didn’t get much done yesterday, school-wise. I went to class and paid attention (well enough), but when I got home, I ate dinner and relaxed for a little bit, did a little bit of BioChem reading, and then went to guitar class…all by myself! Daniel has had a lot of homework and projects and tests lately, so he didn’t go with me last night. But I really enjoy that class, and I’m having fun learning to play the guitar, so it was fine.

After guitar class, I went grocery shopping for this weekend. There are a lot of things that I have to make for this weekend, so I went to get that stuff. And when I got home, Dan and I played together a little bit and I went to bed, while he stayed up to do a test. So…I didn’t get a lot of studying done, but I did other important things. And I actually did accomplish some good things. Sometimes I have to remember that studying is not the most important thing.

Today, I woke up late (got, like, 8 ½  hours of sleep), ran to campus to do a little weight training, and then headed to class, my seminar class. The class had a guest speaker from BYU, actually, and he spoke about memory in the Hippocampus (part of the brain, on the underside), and his research in that area. It was pretty interesting. About half way through his presentation, the fire alarm went off, which is sad because he was interrupted. And it was hard to get back into his presentation. It was weird that it would happen then, though, because the school knows that that hour is particularly set aside for seminars.

Anyway, I walked home, did dishes and laundry, watched a little Gilmore Girls and ate lunch, and then started studying. But I didn’t get very far, because then Daniel called me to go get him from school, and we took a nap together. I woke up over an hour before he did to study some, but then once he woke up we just spent time together, playing, making dinner, folding laundry.

Today was Bowman’s birthday, and they were having a little get-together at their apartment tonight for that. We went a little later. Dan wanted to make a stop at the dollar store to buy him a little present. But once we got there, we ate a delicious pumpkin cake, played games, met new people, and talked. It was fun.

It was a nice relaxing day for me. Didn’t have much studying. Not that I don’t have any, I just don’t get it done. I have two tests coming up that I haven’t studied for much, and I don’t want to study for them. Senioritis kicks in again! I am ready to be done with school. I’m ready to have time to do things I want to do, to actually CLEAN my house, to read the books I want to read, and to learn the things I want to learn.

Things are really good right now though. Dan and I have so much fun together and we love being married to each other. It’s way better than I thought it was going to be. We have a lot ahead of us, but I’m really confident that we can pull through it and make it through together. We love each other a lot. Dan is the best husband in the world. He’s so nice to me, and he really loves me. He treats me well, and there are just a lot of things I really appreciate about him. It helps that we pray and read scriptures together. It helps that the Lord is in our marriage and that we are always going to the temple together. I know that we are so happy together because we are trying to live the gospel. We are SO compatible in these things, and these things are what matter most.

The gospel is so true, the Lord blesses us so much, and I feel His love every day. The fall season in itself is a testimony of His love!

 October 13, 2009

Not a lot has happened the last two days. Yesterday wasn’t a great day for me; I don’t know, I was just in a mood. I studied all morning for my biochem test, went to class, and then took said test. Got an 80%. Not great, but at least I didn’t fail, like I thought I would. And now, I have developed a new study technique for the class, that hopefully will work better for future exams. See, in this class, my professor drops the lowest test score at the end of the semester, so if we are satisfied with our grades at the end of the semester, we don’t have to take the final because he just drops it. My goal was to not have to take the final (one less final to take, less studying to do). But unless I do really well on the next three tests, I will have to take the final. So lately, I have been paying more attention to the reading, taking notes on it, and I’m going to use the study guide more.

I missed my Spanish class yesterday because the test took a lot longer than I thought it would. The rest of the school was fine. Pathophysiology was interesting; we were talking about problems with the head and brain. After I got done with school, I walked home, talked to Kat, picked up Daniel, made dinner, and had Family Home Evening. But, I was just in a mood. I was really tired. I had woken up early to study for my exam, and I didn’t get much sleep. So, Dan and I went to bed early.

This morning, I woke up and went to the gym, came home to get ready, and Dan and I had some pancakes for breakfast. I did dishes this morning, studied a lot for biochemistry, and a few other little things. It was a good day for me, except that I haven’t seen Daniel much today. It’s almost 7:30, and Dan is still on campus studying. I don’t like being alone all day like this. I resort to Gilmore Girls on days like these. Maybe I should start going to campus with Daniel on my days off from school.

My plan is to go to bed early again, so I can get up and work out in the morning. Hopefully I can make a habit of it.

Well, I better go study. I have another test this week.

 October 11, 2009

Sunday

Lately, I seem to have a hard time getting around to writing in my journal, and I attribute some of that to the fact that sometimes writing takes a lot more time than typing, especially for us students who have to type a lot, and are so used to it. So, to keep up with my journal writing, I’m going to try doing it on the computer, and see how it goes.

The last few weeks have been busy and good. It’s October, which I love. There’s that crisp in the air that comes with the Fall, it’s a little chilly, but not wintery cold yet. On Friday, Daniel took me on a date to Olive Garden and to go shopping for Halloween decorations. It was so exciting! We didn’t get too many decorations, but it was still so fun, and our apartment is so cute and Halloweeny. I have some of the decorations that my mom gave me last year for my birthday. One is a little mini wall quilt with a black cat and a pumpkin on it, and it’s SO cute! I love this time of year. All the leaves are changing and it’s beautiful.

School has been crazy. Dan and I both have tests coming up and projects and presentations. It should calm down a little bit after my birthday, but until then, it’s going to be really busy. I don’t think I ever mentioned the classes I’m taking this semester, so I’ll do so now: Biochemistry, Pathophysiology, Spanish Grammar 421, Intro to Sociology, and Guitar for beginners. It’s not as hard a semester as I thought it would be. Next semester will be harder. But I’m also still working on the 441 literature class that I started over the summer, and sometimes it’s hard to remember that I have to work on that class as well. So it gets put on the backburner while I have all these tests going on. Dan and I are taking the guitar class together, and it’s so fun. I’m finally learning how to play the guitar for real! It’s very exciting. I’ve tried to teach myself multiple times over summers, but it never quite happened. I think I need someone to teach me how to play a musical instrument, or it just doesn’t work for me.

Yesterday Dan and I had an interesting experience. Dan’s old girlfriend, Kelli Lund, had something very tragic happen to her. She and her husband had born to them a little boy, about 4 months ago, and on Tuesday of this last week, he passed away in his sleep. We went to the little funeral yesterday with Jimmy and Cody, and it was so sad. We cried a lot, even Daniel (who never cries). I just kept thinking about Kelli and how hard that must be for her to lose a child. According to Dan (I never knew her very well…naturally…former girlfriends and current girlfriends don’t tend to hang out much), all she ever wanted to do was be a wife and mother. And she accomplished her goals in life, but how sad that she lose her first child! I just cannot stop thinking about her. At the funeral, their Bishop spoke a little bit about the plan of salvation, especially in terms of little children that die, there were many musical numbers (those really got to me!), and then at the end Kelli got up and bore her testimony about how she knows the gospel is true and that she’ll see her little guy again someday, because families are forever. It was so sweet. And then she sang “God be with you ‘til we Meet Again”. She said that she sang to her little boy everyday and she knew that he loved to hear her sing. She wanted to sing to him one more time.

It was such a sad thing, but such a testimony builder, as well, of the truthfulness of the gospel and of the great mercy and love of God. Kelli said that she and Jeff (her husband) had been feeling a lot of peace since Tuesday and that they feel God’s love for them. The whole funeral was a tear-jerker and a great testimony-builder.

General Conference weekend (last weekend) was so good. I spent most of Saturday alone in the apartment. Dan was working that weekend (he always works GC weekend), so he was gone when I watched Conference on Saturday. That evening, I went to pick up Daniel from work and we went to his parents’ house. I hung out with them and watched conference with them on Sunday while Daniel was working. We had a good time. I learned how to play scrabble from them.

Tonight, Dan and I had Steve, Inga and Aunt Corkie come over for dinner. We made tacos and Steve and Inga brought a delicious tres leches cake. It was fun to have them all over for dinner. I don’t see my cousins that much, so I don’t know them very well. Over the summer, Dan and I went to see Grandpa Fernandez when Dave and Daisy were there, and it had been years since I’d seen them. It was good to see them and know what they are up to. Same with Steve and Inga. They are expecting, which is really exciting. They’re a fun couple.

Well, I should probably go. Dan and I have to get to bed so that we can get up and study for our exams. I have to take a biochem exam tomorrow and I’m really worried about it. We have been really blessed. Lately I have been feeling a lot better about myself, more confident. Dan helps with this, he makes me feel good. But also, I feel the Lord’s hand in helping me focus on others and helping me forgive others. He fills me with his love and I feel blessed. Dan and I have such a great marriage so far. We have disagreements, but we really love and care for one another. I keep telling people: I hear the first year of marriage is the hardest, but if that’s true, Dan and I have it so good!