This Week + Pictures

Daniel was at Scout Camp until Wednesday. And after that first rough day, on Monday, we were doing pretty good while he was gone. Brooke loved her swim lessons, and it wasn't too hard taking all the kids to lessons. Camille was pretty good.

All this week, Camille has been "Brixton". She keeps saying, over and over and over again, "I'm Brixton!" Really, at least 2 dozen times a day! It's pretty funny, and it reminds me of myself when I was a little girl: "I'm Addohmmmm." (Adam) She's also going through hopefully a phase, where she's just obsessed with food. She's constantly getting into the fridge, the panty cupboard, climbing on the counter, in search of her favorite things. It irritates both Daniel and myself, but I try to ignore it most of the time and just roll with it. Kid phases come and go. And I'm pretty sure Brooke had a phase something like this.

Brooke has been such a little mommy lately, since having Jack. She really loves Jack. She's always wanting to come say hi to him, help me take care of him, and sit down and talk to him and try to make him smile. And he just loves her right back! Every time she goes over to talk to him, his face lights up and he breaks into this huge smile. It's the cutest thing I think I've ever seen!

There's another side to this Mommy phase, though, which shines itself not too kindly upon Camille. She's constantly trying to tell Camille what to do or not to do; she'll come tell on Camille all the time and how she tried to take care of whatever problem it was; and she's always treating Camille like a baby (of course, sometimes they're just playing baby, and Camille doesn't seem to mind that). Actually, Camille doesn't usually seem to mind any of Brooke's mothering towards her. Unless, of course, it results in Brooke taking something that Camille had, which, of course, I'm not okay with.

The other day, I pulled down one year of my printed journal, 2014, and Brooke has been so intrigued by it. She loves looking at the pictures, and she asks me to read little bits of it. Of course, most of it is about her. Camille doesn't come into that picture until the end of the year. In fact, today, the journal was laying on the couch, and Camille came to sit down, and she picked up the journal, turned to the back part of it, and looked at all the pictures of herself. It was pretty funny and cute. These girls just love to hear stories about themselves. Brooke loves to hear stories of when Daniel and I were kids, too. She's always asking for stories about us. I'll have to flip through my old journals and try to find some good stories. Most of my memories of my childhood, or at least memories that could be turned into stories, are not the most pleasant experiences I had. 

Both girls have loved doing the pool this summer with Daniel. I haven't gone much to the pool this summer, for obvious reasons. But he'll take them almost every day. Especially with Brooke. He's been trying to teach her some swimming, and she just loves that! Every time they come home, she bursts through the door saying, "Guess what, mom!" And then proceed to tell me what she was learning with Dad.

A few weeks ago, we went to the zoo, altogether as a family. Daniel decided to buy zoo passes again, so that he could take the girls to the zoo during his leave time, and give me some time with the baby. But I couldn't let them go the first time without me! We weren't there too long. We all got tired and it was a hot day. I had Jack and Brooke with me, while Daniel took Camille at a slower pace. Brooke was so excited to see all the animals. We'd been telling zoo stories for weeks before Jack was born, about how Brooke can talk to the animals and become friends with them. And I think an actual visit to an actual zoo just spurred her imagination.

As for little Jack-man, we just love him to pieces! The girls are always asking about him: "Where's Jack?" "Can I give him a hug/kiss?" "Are you going to nurse Jack now, Mamma?" He is such a good baby! He's so easy to put to sleep -- if he's really tired and ready for bed, either I will just nurse him to sleep (out in 2 minutes flat) or I'll just bounce him gently (he'll wriggle and fuss for a few minutes, and then he'll start nodding off). Works like a charm. He's started sleeping longer at nights, too. He'll take one long stretch at night, and then start waking up every 2 hours to make up for missed feedings. He's so smiley and happy, it's not hard to get a smile out of him. He loves being with people, and he starts to get a little bit fussy and discontented if he's left too long by himself, without anyone talking to him (this is where Brooke comes in so handy. If I'm busy, she keeps him entertained!).

PLUS! Today, we had a lactation appointment, and he was AMAZING! We went to a Support Group meeting a couple of weeks ago, and he barely got 2 ounces total. But today. He got almost 4 OUNCES. I was so happy and proud of him and relieved. And now, I get to start weaning off of pumping.

I just love my little family! I love every single one of them, and I'm so glad Daniel and I have these little people in our lives.

*Brooke is cleaning up the backyard for us! Hah! Child labor at its best.*

*One day the girls built a tent for jack, using a bunch of toy boxes and blankets. I'm not sure how he felt about it, though...*

*Jacky-Boy's first time in the pool, a couple of weeks ago. He was not too sure how he felt about it. At first he cried when we went in. But after about a minute or so, he seemed fine, if not completely enjoying it.*

Summer is Officially Here

... Well, technically, it's officially been here for almost a month. It got HOT fast! We enjoyed a fairer winter and spring than usual, not so many hot days before it's time. But, man it hit fast and hard this year after that! This month has been brutal!

I guess I really don't have much to write. We had Father's Day a couple weeks ago. I made Daniel a picture book with lyrics to a bunch of the songs that we sing to the girls at bedtime. It turned out so cute! I put a bunch of pictures of Daniel with all 3 kids, some of just the kids, and a few with me or the whole family sprinkled throughout. We all loved looking through it after he opened it. I also had the girls give him a Daddy t-shirt.

Daniel has been taking more of his paternity leave over the past few weeks, and it's been so nice having him home with us. And it's nice for me to have an extra pair of hands and eyes around. I've had a couple of weeks with all 3 kids by myself, and it isn't easy. Especially since I often have to ignore the girls for long stretches while I feed the baby and pump. And they ALWAYS are getting into some kind of messy mischief. Especially Camille. That girl is always getting into the food and snacking. The problem is, she doesn't contain her messes in the kitchen. She drags her food messes all throughout the house, and it's really driving me crazy. ...Anyway. It's great having Daniel here, because he gets things done that I have no time to do (like laundry, cleaning, house fixing projects) and because he can keep the girls fairly occupied.

He's also been taking the girls to the pool a lot the last couple of weeks. He's been working one on one with Brooke, trying to teach her some skills in the pool, how to jump in and kick and paddle. She gets so excited about what he's teaching her. When I've gone to the pool with Jack, she's so excited to show me what she'd been learning that day. And if Jack and I don't go swimming, she'll burst through the door to tell me all about it. That girl. She's so excited about life. I wish I had some of her excitement.

People have been asking me how the transition is going for me -- going from 2 kids to 3. And honestly, I think it's gone fairly well so far. I'm not overly stressed; we have good days and bad days (like always); and even though I'm sleep deprived and rarely have a minute to myself, I don't feel like I'm drowning. It's helped, of course, having my mother-in-law and Daniel around so much since Jack's birth. And I wonder how it'll be when Daniel is back to working full-time.

I've really enjoyed this time since having Jack. I do feel a little guilty and sad about how I'm not spending hardly any quality time with the girls. But I do love the time I spend with Jack, feeding him, cuddling him, putting him to sleep. He's such a sweet, charming baby, such a good baby! He's so smiley, it's not hard to get a smiled out of our little man. And he often will fall asleep all on his own, which is much different than either of the girls. Sometimes, I'll have to leave him somewhere so that I can do something for the girls for a few minutes, and by the time I get back to him, I'll find him sleeping.

The hard thing, aside from not having time to myself and not having time for the girls, ... well, I guess there are a number of little things that are a little different and difficult. Like, that I feel guilty often for not spending time with the girls, or even the way that I'm treating them right now -- just not very patient or kind (I'm so sleep-deprived and often grumpy). Or the fact that my house is in almost constant disarray (that one also wreaks havoc on my emotional and mental state, which in turn makes me lash out on the girls ... it's just one thing or another). And also, I'm wanting so badly to get back into working out on a regular basis and get back into my old body, and It's just hard to a) find the time b) find the energy and c) find the desire because of (a) and (b).

Today was a rough day. Daniel is at Scout camp for part of this week, starting on Saturday afternoon. I expected things to be hard at church yesterday, but things actually went really smoothly. I had help from people sitting around us. But today. Sheesh. I think I just woke up really grumpy, and we started swim lessons for Brooke, which meant I had to drag all the kids out to swim lessons first thing that day... Yada, yada. It was a hard day for me, and I lost my temper a number of times and just snapped at the girls. And then felt so bad, because they just fall apart underneath my wrath. Brooke even said, "Mom, you're always mad at me and Camille." Wo, was that a serious low point. I've really got to clean up my act. Even if it is hard, being sleep deprived and busy and not having any time to myself. I know it's okay to have bad days. But it's not okay to be mean to my kids.